Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue…
There is a girl with blue hair, blue eyes and a sometimes-blue soul who has always dreamed of living in a house with a blue door.
She loves her mother, her friends and songs for sopranos.
She hates harsh words, loneliness and April 24th.
Tomorrow is April 24th, and I couldn’t help but want to make it a little bit better for her.
So I will tell you why this girl is lovely. Why the world is better off with her in it. I’ll do that with a little story from not so long ago.
For a few years now, I’ve noticed strange things happen when a wedding is on the horizon. There is joy and happiness, squeals and winks and presents and hugs. There is also sometimes bitter-sweet talk, sadness and worst of all jealousy. Single friends sad to be losing another single friend to impending matrimony. Single ladies in particular feeling a prick of jealousy that their turn has not yet arrived. Sometimes even spite thrown from family members as one person or another clings bitterly to the past, disheartened to watch one of their own leave and cleave. There can be an ache brought on by the conflict of, “I’m happy for you but sad for me.”
The unfortunate truth is, when two people find true love (yes, twue wuv), some build that love up and others poke and prod at it for their own gain. This is the human condition.
In planning for my own wedding, it has been made clear to me that there is nothing new under the sun. Some rejoice in selflessness. Others, the opposite.
In light of all this, I must admit I was nervous to talk about my relationship to my lovely Something Blue. Her and I have been single together, not-so-single together, and burnt and bruised together. Things always seemed to line up so we could relate in real time, and we were always there to encourage one another in hope and strength.
Now picture February. I am newly engaged. My dear friend, the little Something Blue, is talking to me from across the state about the hurt in her heart over boys and loss and loneliness and all the things life tends to throw at us. As I comfort my friend, I fear that it will add to her sting that I now have what she someday wants.
But then she says this, “I know this sounds weird since it’s your wedding, not mine, but it makes everything so much better that you’re getting married. I’m just so happy for you, that it makes me feel less sad.”
I don’t recall exactly how I thanked her then, but this is how I’m thanking her now:
Dear little Something Blue,
That. Is love.
“It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking…” (1 Corinthians 13:4,5) Love is powerful to a degree that is humbling.
I am humbled that there are souls who are so loving that merely the happiness of another would ease their pain.
You, little Blue, have a better grasp on love than so many of those who claim to know it so well.
It is sad that you are often treated with less than the kindness you show others, but do not let the darkness of the world overtake you.
For my wedding day, I am told I should have something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue. You are the best something blue I could ask for.
Please sing for us. Celebrate with us. Join in every bit of joy and thanksgiving because it is meant to be shared.
And remember every day that all of us are so blessed that you are here. Blessed that you still sing, and laugh, and love. Blessed that you can smile and hug your sweet mother and make breakfast with your family on April 24th.
There are those of us who see you for who you really are and love you immeasurably for it. I hope that someday, you see what we see.
Until then, I will never stop praying that you do.
See you in June.
You can still be my something blue even when your hair goes back to brown.